Fun, annoyance, and downright stupidity

Just three quick observances:

• This be International Talk Like a Pirate Day, for you lubbers not in the ken (link)
• I thought I had the delivery schedules of shippers arriving at my house down pretty well... but I forgot how far down the economy's gone, so shippers are light on work, so FedEx arrived early, while I was still out at the office. No biggie, since they do home delivery Saturday too... but I figured I'd head down to the depot (which is maybe two miles from my house) and pick up there while I was out and about... but that depot doesn't handle home deliveries anymore, so they were on the phone for 10-15 minutes with whoever does handle home delivery, wherever that is... long story short, easier to have it dropped by tomorrow.
• While the nice FedEx person was on the phone with her counterpart, I looked at the counter, where there was one of those pen-on-a-chain things for signing... except it was no ordinary pen on a chain. Rather, it's an antimicrobial pen on a chain. Do you mean to say that you routinely have such nasty customers come in to fetch packages that you're afraid of them spreading their nastiness to your customers and employees through the pen they use? Somebody at FedEx corporate needs to get a grip, methinks... harr...